oooo. jittersjitters. got interview tmr.... =/

went shopping for shoes just now cos my white heels don make the cut... my suit is black!!! haha. so... yup... got black heels now.. and it cost a bomb!!! tsktsk. badbadgirl.........

it's early in the morning- at 11am... which is about 9am sg time... which means i gotta wake up around..... 7???? 7am sg. argh. i'm so gonna die!!!!! lol.

wonder how sheryl's interview went.... what did u wear??? hmmm. haha. i might be wearing my guest relations uniform.. =/

went down to the school in manly today and it was GORGEOUS!!!!! like totally wowowowoww!!! but the fees were extreneky wow too. about $1000 a week........... let's focus on the school. it's sooooooo beautiful!!! it's a magnficent old building- harry potter style, and about harry potter size too or bigger. and the view is lovely!!! it's sooooooooo perfect. i wanna buy the whole place, then bring up my brood of kids there!!!! haha.

i miss mr boyfriend. 5 days to go!!! yeh!!!!! baby, let's go to grape vine k???? i miss that place!!!!!! haha. den let's stay home for the rest of the time and watch VCDs. => sounds lovely. and we take turn to poison each other with our cooking k?? hee. love u baby. =>

*sniff* hmmm. it's bedtime here.. => i'm walking ard the house in purple and black striped tights. They're so hideous i *sniff* love them. cant wait for helloween!!!!! lalalaaa..... suddenly regret not getting the black tights with gold *ah-chooooo!!* webs on them.. hmmmmm...*sniffsniff*

just got mom to find my certs for me.. so i'll prolly be sleep*sniff*ing soon.... after i call my dearest of cos. =D

sheryl n mandy, i'll do *sniff*up a tag board or comment board when i get back k??? sorry!!! *sniff* hee. i'm soooooooo sleepy. and sick. i'm ah-chooo-ing. that's not a good sign.. i wanna*sniff* shooopppppppp!!!!!!!!!!

just a lil' cassan nonsense.

eating = happy
eating alot = very happy
exercise = hardwork
no exercise = weight gain
eating alot + no exercise = extreme weight gain
extreme weight gain = fat

recently, i have been very happy, and i did not do any hardwork at all.

therefore, i am a fat and very happy.

i'd rather be fat and very happy, then skinny and sad. hee.
since i've been with cliff, i have been eating alot. =D



k la. k la. i know i'm full of crap laaaa.
bleah.
but u still love me right??? (question posted to my girlfriends and boyfriend)

oh! i wonder how's bestie andy the current baldie. => it rhymes!!!!!!!!
i miss andy the bald bestie. hahahahhaaa.

boo. i need a freakin resume. I FORGOT HOW TO WRITE RESUMES!!!!I HAVE NO IDEA WHATSOEVER HOW TO WRITE A RESUME!!!! blah. xinyu...... help??

aned i left my JC testimonial and result slip in singapore!!!!!! -bang head- not that the result slip will help in any way... but my testimonial was good k!!! sigh. dumb blonde.

anw, mr boyfriend seems to be enjoying his job.. he gets to surf the net... go to the gym during lunch.... sounds nice.. haha. i shall get an office job when i come back to company him!!! we can go to work together in the morning, then meet for dinner after work!!! yeh!!!! wait.... i think i prefer staying home. then i can cook dinner for him!!!! woohoo!!!! haha.sorry baby, i'm going mad. i have one whole list of what i wanna cook for u when i come back already... =>

oh. i think this is a good time to announce to the world that i have put in 4kg so far... SHERYL!!!!!!! we need to diet together!!! lolol. but i'm still happily eating my nutella every day before dinner... and after dinner i got my butterscotch icecream and butterscotch liqueor(did i get the spelling right??). tat butterscotch liqueor tastes soooo damn god. bittersweet and fattening! hahaa.. rockmelon vodka for breakfast... xinyu!!!! sheryl!!!!! see what u're missing out on???? hahahhaaa... but at least u're not getting fat here. -sulks-

oh. i learnt how to make jam. i shall make my own strawberry jam when i come back!! lalalalaaa....

erm.... cliffydear?? i really have not found anything for u....... =/ neither have i found anything for the cygnus girls... (boys don need presents. =D) shall not gie up.. shall continue intense shopping!! haha. hope i get results this time..

i miss my boyfriend... miss seeing him and miss talking to him n miss looking at him and miss holding his hand and miss stoning with him....

miss the girls... just miss them. =>

went down to a school yesterday... sounds quite good... but i'm still waiting to get an interview with the intercontinental.. going down to manly tomorrow to look at another school... =< boring!!!!!! hah.

it's freaking cold today.... was raining last night and now my nose is dripping... my fingers are freezing... oh mandy?? sorry- not much bikinis... cos it's mostly winter clothes now... can u believe that the shop i went to din even carry slippers/thongs anymore??? sigh. it's mostly boots and warm fuzzy bedroom slippers. I WANT MY UGG BOOTS!!!!!!!!!

i love supre. so much. =>

but not as much as i love my boyfriend. and my girlfriends.

please continue missing me, will be back soon!!!!!! -MUACKX-

PS. the beach is W O N D E R F U L!!!!!!!!!

hello.. i finally managed to find my way here.. the buttons weren't working properly but well.. i finally manged to get on anyway..

watching million dollar baby for the second time.. each time i see her get that final blow, i wish that the stool wasnt there, she din get hit, she lived and blablabla...... i just hate the ending of the story. i hate the way a fighter dies. it's just not fair at all. argh. and so utterly cruel and heart-wrenching. but there are saving graces i guess; the way a girl finds a father who loves her as he would love his own daughter. that was nice. her acting is damn good. the storyline is devasating.... yet so touching.

i don hate it here. in fact, i love it. i'm spoilt for choices for my bedroom. the one in the attic with the view of my future pool (which is not gonna be a tiny affair), or the one below the living room with the view of the ocean, a balcony, and if i bother to try, i can probably get the entire level to myself as well which will be damn nice. the down side of the room in the attic is that my room is the same size as my dad's toilet. it's not that my room is small- my room is normal size, with my own toilet n all... BUT. his toilet is at least twice the size of a normal toilet. yea. with a huge spa bath tub and all.. life is not fair. i want the master room-it has everything that i want.

reasons y i don like it? simple. i feel like the odd piece of a jigsaw puzzle that can't fit in. two is company but three is none.. no matter how hard everyone tries, i'll still feel weird. maybe if u let me transport all the ppl i love over.. den it'll be good. it'll be like bringing along my box of jigsaw- the box where i came from, and i'll fit happily into the picture.

i miss my girls and my boys and my boyfriend.

went to flemington markets today and it was huge- took like 4 hours to comb the whole place.. then the fruits were going cheap so we got a carton of rockmelons at $4. if i come back looking round and orange like a rockmelon, please continue being my friend?? i'm still the same inside you know.. =>
got quite a lot of shopping done there.. i wanna get my ugg boots tho. and the shirtdress, and hot pink tights and i'll wear the whole ensemble together and look hideously lovely. haha. i'm gonna get knee-high tights for the girls!!! xinyu:rmb sff??? haha. those horrible stockings.. lolol. i like!!

i don't miss shopping in singapore- been shopping there all my life.

sheryl, u'll like to hear this- u know the markets i went to today sold puppies as well?? they were tiny lil things that were sooooooooo cute!!!! u would have drooled over them.. i did. =D~ really cutesy lil things that ran around your legs, and you could pick them up and carry them and cuddle them.... sigh. i want a dog!!!!!

the flight here was alright.. there was something really stinky.. and after awhile, i realised that the smell came from the man sitting next to me- he has smelly feet!!! HORRIBLE! argh. the food was good tho.. beef country pie, icecream, and chicken and beef kebab. i loved the kabab. the service wasn't the best tho.. i still like singapore airlines the most. hahaha!!!

it's bedtime... 11pm here now... bbl! *muackx*

boo. in about 24 hours i'll be somewhere above the seas... in between here n down under. i miss cliff already. don miss he girls ye.. cos they're still in my room..

going there all alone. i know i'm gonna cry like mad on e plane.. i can feel it. really hope xinyu n sheryl can fly down next week man.... sigh.

had a great lunch today.. at mandarin.. i love xinyu.

met sheryl. took pictures... i love sheryl too.

met cygnus ppl... ate a little.. crapped alot.. laughed loads.. love them too.

had mushroom soup for supper, courtesy of my boyfriend (he's a GREAT cook!!).. i LOVE MY BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


yea. cliff?? reading this??? i miss u already. so veryvery much dear.. sigh. -hughug-

yinsiu n weiying coming down to send me off tmr.. they say it's a rehearsal.. lolx. but i love u too dearies.

lovelove- ppl who know me n know cliff n read this, please do me a favour?? take care of my darling for me. thank you. so much. =>

Fine.Thanx for info sher.. Sed finally has a girlfriend. one less eligible male for the eligible females out there.. on the bright side.. he can finally stop asking us to intro girls!!!!! hahahahaaa!!

i'm soooooo looking forward to goodwood park tmr!!! thanx for finding the place xinyu.. and thanx for lending ur cam as well.. what will i do without u??

did u know? my best friend, miss toh xinyu, proudly stuffed one of her thicker jackets into my bag the other day... "it's cold in australia, u'll need it!" awwwwww........ so sweet. i must have been an extremely nice person in my past life, that's why i got rewarded with such a darling friend in this life!!! haha. i love you dear.

i am planning to take lotsa toothbrushes and shavers from the airplane. i love all these disposable stuff. they make me soooooo happy!! haha. plus it's convenient- use finish, throw.

i missed PA soooo much. went down with cliff's parents last thurs.. all 3 of us were trying to spot cliff when the ppl marched out.. but guess what? we couldnt.. cos they all looked the same!!!! hahaha. all blue. then i got out of my seat and ran to the middle to try my luck... was about to give up when i spotted someone's head moving. hahahaha. that idiot!!! brought his mom o see him and he stuck his tongue out at her.. lol. he looks good in his uniform- i like =>

dinner with my cygnus darlings tmr... meeting them at suntec..... it's like, i wanna see the whole world before i leave. madness. but i don care. i wanna see them. => it's gonna be a great day!

and i'm gonna try and enable messages... so that sheryl can type here instead of in her blog.. and to make mandy happy. damn i'm nice! (i'm just hoping that i'll get friends as great as these again in my next life!!)

boo.... i HATE baking cookies. i just can't do it..
cooking lessons anyone??
i wanna learn chinese cuisine.. and how to bake cakes and such. =>
(next time can save money.. just give a birthday cake as present! muahahaa!!)

xinyu, sheryl... i promise that i will bake u guys a cake.. sometime in my life... and after that.. i will learn how to bake famous-amos like cookies!!! current standard is around famous anus i think.. heh. =x but still, it has our sweat and love and effort in it!!! (ok fine.. towards the end only two of u.. heh.)

and thanx so much for counting stars with for me.. hehe. i donno what i'd do without you two pretty ladies!!!



i was browsing thru friendster... saw horrible photos that shocked the fats outta me. shall not mention who and what and why... but after seeing those photos, i was so traumatised that i kept eating n eating n eating....... and now, all the fats that were shocked outta me have been gained back. sadsEd case.

speaking of which.. i wonder what happened to super handsome friend, SED.
i wonder if he reads my blog.. no.. i don't think so.. he is too i-donno-what to read blogs..



i remember the day when eugene told me he dosen't club anymore cos he turned christian. my jaws dropped. i couldn't believe he could just give up clubbing like that.. i mean, i have seen that guy!!! when he swivels his hips he is HOT! plus the fact that he is tall and cute (tho the last time i saw him he had some not-so-cute pimples on his chin.. PS. oxy has some new blemish gel that looks quite good!!)..

that was quite a significant blow to me.

THEN. yinsiu started clubbing less...... and less......... and suddenly stopped. guess what? "cos i'm a christian...." grrrrr. yinsiu is like hot mamma on the dance floor laaaa....... she is like, MADE for dancing man!!! seriously!! it comes so naturally to her even when she's doing techno!! sigh. my heart broke. fine. so i was pissed. how can u give up dancing, enjoying urself, having fun, relaxing... for your religion?


just now i got another heart attack. weiying is going for cell group meetings?? like HUHHUHHUH????????????? what is happening to the world???? WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY FRIENDS???? i heard the girls looking at a cross and saying they should get it for weiying.. i dismissed it as a cross can be just an accessory.. then when i heard she had cell group tmr...........

that was not the final blow.

final blow came when sheryl said that she might be going for cell group with weiying and yinsiu tmr. seriously... xinyu, pls don't do the same to me.. i don't think i will be able to take it. is it like the current trend or something??? y u guys? y so sudden??? so.........weird. i love you all.. but i need time to accept it.

just one warning: don't try whatever tricks they tried on you, on me.




sigh. and another thing........ sheryl and weiying, please do not ostracize clubbing.. u'll hurt the club's feelings.. and mine.. =<







and cliff is still not here. grrr.

from a frequent blogger, i now blog like so frickkin little. blah. whose fault? my com. argh. i don like my com. i got sooo many issues to tackle!

like.... how all the mediacorp artists are giving birth/getin pregnant together.. it's making me sick to read how many of them have given birth and how many weird names they're coming up with to embarass their kids.

it is sooooo mad!!! like ritz, regent and raffles?? i know u'll never get to own these hotels, but it dosent mean u should name ur kids after them!! spare a thought for them!!! giving them classy names dosent ensure they'll grow up with class u know??

and brayden??? i can just hear the kids calling "here come the donkey!! braaaayyyy!!!! braaaayy!!!" and the reply.."don luff at me hor!! i ell my marmee den u noe arh!! my marmee will sueee u arh!!"

beckham??? i pray he grows to to be at least decently looking else woe betide the not-so-handsome boy named after the quite-good-looking footballer.

many more names to go actually.. and anyone noticed this week's 8days?? i thot it was fann wong with a baby. turned out to be liln with frizzy hair and her baby in christian dior, biting a tiffany's rattle, hair styled by david gan. like wow. the lil thing is only a kid. i hope she dosen't grow up to be a brat. tho i'd be one damn proud kid if i were sage cadence wu- my mom's a babe n dad's a hunk. just that i wont really enjoy being named after a spice.. but it's still better than being named after a hotel.

read The Newpaper today, and saw that christopher lee FINALLY admited to being together with fann. i'm happy for them. really. it's nice they finally came out in the open.. and i think they look great together.. but seriously.. fann should just hurry get married n have kids soon.. she's geting old... i've been looking at her since i was like... 10?? that's like 9 years ago!! if she dosen't hurry and catch up.. she's gonna be an old mama..

xinyu poined this out... all the artists kids will grow up together, prolly fall in like and in love and get married to each other and it will become ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY. how perfectly disgusting.



next.
last weekend, i was working at a certain roadshow and giving out pamphlets.. and guess what?? i got snubbed by a maid!!! i politely, smilingly, nicely greeted her with a "hi mdm, would u like to take a look?" and she rolled her eyes and brushed past me!!! i know u're a maid. i know u get ordered around the entire week. but still u don't have to do that to me!!! bitch.

this goes out to all the idiots who nodded when i said the exact same line to them, then walked away without taking the pamphlet. don't u know what u're doing u morons???? u bloddy nodded, which meant yes, u'd take a look, then u walk off. how moronic can u get?!!!!

and to those kiasu ppl.. who snubbed me and declined a pamphlet till i said "inside got discount voucher..". u should have seen the change in her expression. she grabbed one eagerly, showed her friends, then turned back to ask for more.

b l a h .

how perfectly annoying.

and the bloody tua pek kong. or tua pek lan as i like to address her. who happily sat at the counter and refused to move her fat ass till she wanted to go touch up her make up, do her hair or go for a break. u're working!!!! and part of ur job include moving ur fat ass ard! grrrr.

and to the skinny black fishnets. before asking me to return "your" pen-the pen u found on the floor- look carefully!! the pen has MY name on it! u thief!! i don believe u din know that pen was mine. like fuck! u borrowed it so many times from me! noone else was using that same pen! and what's your prob anyway?? how many road show's have u worked at? and it's not your first day at work, it's your fourth!!! don't you know how to bring your own pen???? and sop stealing my customers and writing down their purchases as yours, I made those sales skinny!






1 day left till his POP. don't have to wait till weekends to meet him anymore.

*note to self*
must discuss chalet soooon!!!!!!! -grin-

i love my bestfren. she lets me bite her once in a blue moon when the cannibal in me aches to surface. at other times, i love her simply for being her.

i love sheryl. she lets me pig out on keropok on her sofa, and i lvoe the fact that she cut her lovely hair off!! (i like to think that she did that to make me less jealous of her lovely hair, tho i never told her. now u know!!)

i love gracie. she just offered to do a brazillian for me for $20. but forget it dear, u're not coming near meeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!

i love weiying. cos she usually agrees to go swim with me early in e morning but she's gonna cu her hair tmr so i shan't bother asking.

i love yinsiu. i love her brownish cuduroy jacket n i donno what i'd do if she hadn't lent me cash in genting!!! i'd cry cos i cant shop!!!!

i love my boyfriend. he spent his last $2 on a rose for me. =D




my house has been invaded by ants. Y U C K.

i wanna go swim. i need a diet. i think i should start exercising. i'm tempted to buy a return ticket to aussie with my meagre savings then make my dad get me a new phone. i want a brazillian. i haven seen nini n nana for ages. i miss my handphone. i want all my numbers back. my dearest boyfriend has sweetly lent me his phone. i wanna get quick money. i need to save up n spend all at the same time. i miss the messages in my phone. cliffcliffcliffcliffcliffcliffcliff. where is xinyu i need to bitch. EMBEMBEMB!! i wanna go out but i don have the money. i wanna get a new com new laptop new bed new wardrobe new house. i constantly think of japan n disneyland wth my girlfriends. i wanna go back to genting. i miss andy n i lost his number. andy if u read this pls message me, your bestie, like asap. i hope eugene dosent have to wear a helmet anymore so his chin wont have so many pimples.

ok.. that's all i can think of for now. cliff should be in dreamland, i think xinyu is sleeping too.. i should go meet them soon.. then get on with applications tommorow.

btw, SUPPORT LINDERRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LINDERRRRR FOR MISS SINGAPORE UNIVERSE 2005!!!!!!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.................... i FINALLY got onto blogger. i forgot my password. =x
anw, been workin he past 10 days, so busy, so shagged that i forgot how to live. i like my colleagues tho.. =>

i LOVE cocoa tree chocolates!!!!!!!!!!! they're like the best thing ever invented!!! of cos, i still love dove amicelli and toffifee!! hehe. been eating bread like every single day n every single meal...

oh. i lost my phone again. hink some customer took it. LIKE WHY THE FUCK U WANT SUCH AN OLD MODEL FOR MAN??!!!!!!!! c*** b**.

gonna get my sim card later... will be using my baby's phone for a while.. he spoils me too much. i like. =>

erm.... ok. the end. i donno what else to say la.... needa get a good shit.

OHOHOH!!!! i loved genting!!! hahahahaa... let's go again soon k???? i wanna eat dimsum!!!! hahahahaa!!!!!! ohohoh! we can be e dimsum dollies!! hahahaha. -muackx- love u girls!!

the good news is that i had alot to say.
tthe bad news is that i tried to post it without connecting to the com.

bah.


anw, main points:

how does one make oneself look older????

i am going shopping in aussie after 20mar.

mandy, yanjun, stef(in the order that i saw them in town) and me shld meet up soon instead of only bumping into each other. =>

linda is one of the top25 finalists for miss singapore universe. SUPPORT LINDAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!
you go girl!!!!!

last night was disastrous... coupled with my DMS was castastophic.
but in the end, all was well. so i gotta tell the world that i'm happy like a crabbycrab again. haha..
What's my favourite moment? sitting in kopitiam at 2+ in the morning, staring at the reflection.=>

i'm home alone. =<

but it's not too bad... had great company earlier....
and i got a rose!!!! a very nice big fat lovely rose!! -grin-
nice way of giving it to me.. he told me to stick my head in his bag.
but anyway...... sooo sweeeetttt!!!!!!!!!!!! i love my rose. haha. it kept me grinning for quite a while.. and it totally made my day.=D

dragon. DRA GON!!! i don do the tongue thing!!! =>

i have found my latest love - mulan.

Valentines day was great... somehow.


Sheryl:

Always rmb- u, xinyu, me.. always and forever, whichever is longer.
cos this trio has to be stuck together!!! yupyup!! EMBs and gyming and window shopping till we drop! not forgetting the SSG!! which u two idiots have dropped out off.... =<>), and of very similar height n weight!!! hahahahahaa!!!!!! btw, i always hated ur hair. it's damn smooth n silky n long n not damaged n straight!!! life's not fair!!!! haha. love ya!!! always here for u!!! =>



Soohui:

How come i only get to see u like, once in a million years??? HUH????? hahaa.... don worry la... can NEVER EVER forget u!! and ur ways. lol... ^5!! but this being a v-day greeting, i hope u and elson get married soon. we all wanna be bridesmaid!!!!



The rest of the girls; Weiying, Shimin, Yinsiu:

Yinsiu, i'm still not used to calling u jane. heh. and i wish u'd just continue clubbing laaa..... *point middle finger* haha...
Weiying, it's always nice swimming with u. hahahaa... tanning buds!!! lol.... always tanning and getting roasted together... lol.... but let's go swim again sooN!!! i enjoyed our v-day out together... hope u did too!!!
Shimin, ur blurness is soooo cute!! haha... all e best in ur tests this week.... OH!! n all the best in ur love life too!!! haha...

To the qi jie mei, let's stick together n not lose contact k??????




i'll save the rest of my speech for when i leave. too lazy to type now. it's hot n humid and i'm sweating. (yes, sweating, cos i'm a pig. =>)



the porridge is happy to see you!!!






last night is black was..... an eye opener.
totally utterly disgusting, yet i can' t take my eyes of it. =/

i declare myself the luckiest girl around. =D

reasons are as follows:
#1 i had 2 pre-valentine celebrations.
#2 he planned everything, and gave me the sweetest valentine's day ever!
#3 he cooks for me every sunday =>
#4 he made chocolate chip cookies for me!!!!!
#5 he made me a card; 10 pages of words, 8 pages of drawings.
#6 he likes me as i am. (fat, attitude problem, emotionless, senseless, weird etc... )
#7 he is frank, straighforward, and honest. impt!!!
#8 i have him.
#9 I HAVE HIM!!!!!

ok... lots more reasons.... no stamina to list them. but i've been a happy kid for a longlonglong while!!!

i declare that Cliff is the sweetest guy ever =>




can u believe that both of us actually forgot what was the first movie we watched together??? guess who rmbed? xinyu. lolol.... i had to ask if she knew.. and after awhile.. she was like... "i know!! guo bao!!!! " national treasure. haha. now we know... we were racking our brains trying to think of it la........... =x 2 heck-care and extremely forgetful ppl...... =D


i like the guy. really. lots. lots n lots!!



i'm spending v-day with the girls.... booked the place already... =>
gonna be a good food and mageurita filled night.. not forgetting the romantic lesbianic conversations..... hahahahhahaaa.






To my laopo of 6 years+, Miss Toh Xinyu:


Through quarrels and squabbles and cold wars and wanting to slap each others and wanting to hate each others and other childish shits..

Through the knowledge that you've been there and you'll be there though i was a selfish single-minded, blinded, heartless, ignorant bitch..

Through the knowledge that though sometimes i wanna kick u off the building and push you down the stairs yet deep down i cannot imagine a life without you..

Through the knowledge that sometimes i know you wanna pull my hair and bang my head against the wall and throw me off the building cos i so deserve it yet u held ur actions..

Through the times we made up that always made me cry or tear and the messages so sweet and heart-warming that you sent..

Through EMBs and sms-ing across the table and reading each other's minds sometimes and eyeing up the same ppl and thinking the same thing bout the ppl we're eyeing..

Through clubbing and dancing and drinking and making friends with bouncers and bartenders and planning to kick ppl off the podium..

Through the times when i'm moody and u'd just let me simmer and the times when i'm mad and u'd laugh with me and the times when i fall and u'd check if i'm ok then laugh at me and the times when i'm just me and u're just u and we're just enjoying each other's presense..

Through the times when we'd get each other at least 50% similar items for birthday presents and have the same idea for gifts and suprises and put in the effort to make each other feel special and happy on our special days which are just 2 days apart..

Through the sleepovers and attempts to lose weight and attempts to do lotsa things and our similar want to own a hotel...

Through the times when we were ugly and unkempt pre-teens and the times when we tried to be more feminine and the times when we'd go out and u'd agree to eat good food with me..

Through the baggy jeans and the discovering of delapitory creams and shaving and waxing and epilating and the spag tops and halters and tubes and the bellbottom jeans and the knee length denim skirts and the mid-thigh length skirts..

Through the moments we'd sit and talk and decide that our kids should know each other and we should discipline each other's kids and that we'd be old grannies drinking tea together and show our kids and grandkids all our neoprints taken when we were young and wrinkle-free..

Through the tears and the joy and the bitter moments and the sweet moments and the fears and the secrets and the gossips and the bitchings and the crushes and the loves..

I never regretted the day we walked around the parade square looking at the stalls the classes decorated for home coming... it was around 6pm i think.. it was the day you entered my life.
I will never regret that day.

Thank you so much for everything best friend, know that i love you.

It's been 6 years and counting... Happy Valentine's Day 2005...

boo...... gong xi fa cai!!!!!

my tarts came out weirdly nice. haha. weird cos tho it's not fantastic, it makes me happy when i look at it, and when i eat it, i feel even happier!!! lalalaaa....

sigh.... walked till my legs broke ytd, still cant find what i was looking for. grrrrr.

got so much to lament, but no mood.. hahaa.... so.... i'll be back in a few days. =>

*cross fingers*
hope tarts turn out ok.......

clubbing on wed, eating spree on tues.

so weird last night.. but i like drinking. =>
took pictures with weird strangers too.. haha...
damn! sheryl got a REEEAAAAAL cute guy!! hahahaa. i thot he was some old uncle.. den when he turn ard, woah! hahaha..
then on the dance floor, there was a eeuuccchh!!! some one brought their daddy along!! haha.. k la.. i know ppl at all age club... =/ but...... it was just a shock la...
then xinyu n mr bouncer! haha. made new frenz.. gd on ya! heh..
take care of ur eye girl... -hug-
and take care of urself sher.. -hug-



i LURVE food.
so much.


anw, anyone has any idea how to use multiply??
cos i don. heh.

ugh.

i just heard cannon in D get butchered on tv.








i need to change my template. it's getting old and mouldy like me.
i still cant believe i'm turning 19 soon. eeew.......



some guys are such jerks.
arent they?

was gonna bitch bout the bloody cheena mama who kept cutting into everyone's lane, her 2 bloody kids who kept swimming the breadth of the pool while the WORLD was doing lengths (in other words, they too were in the fucking way),
the pasty white blubber filled arse who tried to talk to me, and kept staring.

but i reached home and saw the most horrendous message. and now i'm too tired to bitch. i just wanna bathe and sleep. like nothing i've done today matters anymore. fuck.

argh. i hate this feeling.

I FOUND MY PHONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


list of ppl to thank: Grace,
Weijie aka allie,
Amanda kee, (and whoever manda got my no. from)
Cab driver,
Cliff.

cos in the series of cause and effect and events, these were the ppl that came in somehow or other, and helped me get my phone back. thank you all sooooooo much.



*kowtow*

Thanks for dessert kim. =>


i'm SO burnt.

so veryveryvery burnt. =<

but i like being red! haha!

but Y ARE MY FINGERS STILL WHITE?????????

i wanna swim moremorWmoREmOREMORE!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAREST KIM!!!!!!!!!!!!

-hughughughughughughughughughguhughughughughug-
-muackxmuackxmuackxmuackxmuackxmuackxmuackx-

u're my dearest bro man!!
and now u're a 19 year old fart! hahaha =D

may all ur wishes come true!!

argh. the pool was soooooo crowded. ended up swimming at the training pool, where the water came up to only my waist. blah.

anw, saw this fat pig TRYING to swim free style. she had no idea whatsoever how to do it properly and was dumbly flapping her arms ard, splashing water in all directions. after every 3 or 4 strokes she would stop, take a breather, then continue her struggle to keep afloat while her 4 limbs struck out at every possible direction.


i was that fat pig.





help someone?
i totally forgot how to swim freestyle.
and i desperately neeeed to rmb!!!
-bang head agains wall-

boooo..... another loooooooooooooooong week to go through.. sigh.
will whoever it is that has my phone PLEASE return it to me????

*kowtow till my head bleeds*

i've been looking thru all the phones... nh i like. none at all. argh. i want my trusty old 6510 back.
it's the bestest phone ever. argh.

pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee return it???????????

today, or rather, yesterday, i renewed my hatred for polishing boots.
spent almost 3 hours on them n THEY STILL REFUSED TO SHINE!!!! argh.
it's the LAST TIME i'm ever picking up the kiwi. ok. maybe not.. maybe i'll try again some day..
but.... sigh. overwhelmed by failure. can someone guide me step by step how to make a pair of boots shiny????

pleeeeeeeaseeeee???????????

anw, was thinking bout NPCC. and how it has affected me.
was spring cleaning just now when i chanced upon my uniform. first class drill badge, almost full 2 rows of collectible badges(only life saving is missing), police knowledge, erm..... oh. the rank. but none of that seems to matter now!!!!!!

then again... there are the bittersweet memories of camp; flooded tents and big fat ants, maggi mee n curry chicken, the friendship that formed, the camaraderie.. the radiant faces around the camp fire. i love camp fires =>

ok.. so to a certain extent, i DO miss npcc.
sigh..
those were the days........


on the topic of memories..
Y are all memories bittersweet??
i have never met a person who left me only sweet memories. there are always the bitter bits.. i guess it's the bitter part of it that makes the sweet parts sweet.. ya get my drift??
but then..... sometimes, when something is too bitter, it drowns out the sweet moments.




the weekend is almost over. boys gonna disappear again. i hate this.. sigh.
anw, it's time for serious shopping. (tho i have no money!!!!!!) =>

xinyu!!! sheryl!!!! let's go SHOPPING!!!!!!!
-grin-

ARGH.


F U C K F U C K F U C K



Dear God.... please???????

hmmmm.........
tmr is a busy day.
sighhh. so much to do.. so little timeeeeeeeeee
but being busy keeps me happy =>

today i am officially a free kid. in ALL ways.
i got my passportttt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

then we went shopping!!!!!!! -grin-
salads at bean, icecream at julius, cinnamon stick things at erm... cheerios??
simply food.
simply bliss!
then we went shopping again!!!!

sorry for the lumpy custard dearies..... = /

oh. mahjong session just now. i won 2 games. throughout which, one i was talking o him, the other i was msging him. see?? then i lost the rest.. lol. watched 1o things i hate about you at the same time.. that girl's pretty.

my face is peeling horribly, cos i'm shedding my old skin. cos i've grown too fat for my old skin. cos the old skin can't stretch anymore to fit my new fat face. cos i've put on weight and my face has expanded. so that's y i'm an ugly shedding thing now.. like a snake.

she(2) shu(3) yi(1) wo(1)




anw, i can't stand rude people;
ppl who don't mind their Ps & Qs,
ppl who command you ard,
ppl who use THAT tone of voice when commanding you ard,
ppl who think they're the princess or something.

i'm sorry man. don work with me. rudeness just so turns me off. argh.

be polite, it dosen't kill.

some call it basic manners.




anw, plans for tmr.
SWIMMING!!!!!
SQUASH!!!!!!
bliss. =>
oh.. and then COOKING!!!! hahaa =>

i wanna get my life saving cert.
who cares bout driving. i just want my life saving cert!!!!!! haha.
xinyu can care about driving.. den she can drive us ard for FOOD.


i think food is reallyreally important.
really!
reallyreallyreally.
i miss rain forest cafe... their food was supercalifragilisticexpealidocious!!!!!!!!!

i need slp for now.. =>
tmr's a long n busy day...

waiting for tomorrow to come.. so that i can open my next prezzie. =>


valleys.
mountains.
cliffs.
so far away.
come back. i miss u. =<

lonely.
empty.
lost ppl.
messed up life.
love; loved
hurt..
hurt..
hurt..
HURT.
gone
pain
tear
i feel
u.







feeling like a pampered kid.
lotsa comic strips to feed my appetite. =>
so sweet.
so very sweet.

Dearest Cassandra Reyes, wherever, whoever you are. i really hope that God will bless you and bring you back safely.. i don't know you at all, but i feel an affinity, cos we've got the same name. yea.. i really hope you're alright.. =>




had a afternoon of squash and teppenyaki n slacking at coffee bean. feels like living again. tmr, it'll be right back to mundane office shit. blah. sighhhh..............
-scream-
last night was good. kumar was good.. at first. but still good. =>
but my legs got numb.. and today they got thoroughly stretched.. hahaha..
i HATE standing for hours on end with bloody too-tall-for-his-own-good angmoh blocking me!!! grrrrr. sigh.
at least i'm happy. haha. i like being happy. =>

there IS such a thing called the point of no return.
you've reached it.

din go to work today. i am sick. it started out as an excuse, but now i'm really sick.. blah.
woke up after 3.. went for food at the mall ard 5... went to say hi to xinyu.. ate gelato.. walked ard.. went home to cook for mom. i'm sleepy again.. sigh.

dinner last night was great!! company was even better! =>
will put up he picures later.. if i feel like it.. but don worry.. i'll send u guys the pix k!!
*muackx*
love you ppl!!!
anw, take care leo... hahahaa. ur head's gonne be feeling cold for awhile.. lol
and stef?? plspls take care k!!!! -hug-
and mandy n yanjun? u ppl rock!! ahahaa. love u all!!!!
khaywee n daryl deserve mention too.. one for being nice.. (sometimes) and the other for giving me cooking tips! wheeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-yawn-
take care peeps!


oh. take care andy, missing u already. =<
AHAHAHAHHA! ok. i shld not laugh. all the best..

hmmm.
broke a glass bottle just now.
ever realised how the person who tries to pick up the pieces is he one who gets cut?
and that when glass shatters, it scatters, so it's really hard to pick up the pieces?
and some pieces of shattered glass are sooo small, that you can't see them, but they hurt the most when the cut, cos they get embedded in your flesh?

yea. idelible wounds.

i just decided on my biggest new year resolution.



Ensure that Xinyu gets a driving license!!!!


-grin- hell yeah, i need a chauffeur!! ahahahaa... *muackx*
dinner was lovely sweeties.. catching up amidst our hectic work lives!! hahaha..
love ya.
miss ya too.

hmmm.
i had dinner with bestie.
i'm spending ALL my pay before i even get it.. but at least i bother to treat them(especially since i'd promised to give them a treat with my first pay.). i hate it when ppl break promises. really.
so andy, don't break ur promise!! hahaha.
i was a great dinner tho.. had a nice long heart to heart session! =p

and 2005 is a whole new year. so it's a whole new me too.

new year resolutions:

#1 not to be taken for granted by anyone.
#2 not to take xinyu n sheryl for granted.
#3 not to be in second place anymore.
#4 not to be used as a substitute.
#5 not to take mom for granted.
#6 not to take ppl who are impt to me for granted.
#7 not to let anyone kill me emotionally. i've had enough of that.
#8 to spend 80% of my time being happy.
#9 not to let ANYONE screw up my life again.
#10 to lose weight. =>


Xinyu, Sheryl, i solemnly promise to love and treasure thee through good times and bad, through health and illness, till always or forever, whichever is longer.

PS. lets fufill my tenth resolution together!!! hahahah

hmmm. it was a great new year. hee. went to warehouse.. it was blardy empty!!
hahahaha. goods delayed due to tsunami!! hurhur~

was walking along the streets when it turned 12. i can't rmb the last time i counted down with a group of ppl.. we always miss it!! ahaha. i had just pressed the traffic lights... and xinyu, sheryl and jeanne were screaming hapy new year.. so we laughed ard and hugged and kissed.. and crossed the road when the little guy turned green. and we SCREEEEEEAAAAAMMMMEEEDDDD!!!!!!!!!! aha. that's always my favourite part, the screaming. i love you xinyu n sheryl. always and forever, whichever is longer yea? -hug-

went down to zouk to say hi to kenneth..
met my favourite grp of ppl!! MANDY N STEF N YANJUN N DARYL N KHAYWEE!!!!!!! leonard dearest was at warehouse.. haha.
have i mentioned i love these guys?? I LOVE THEM!!!! hahahhaahahaa... it's been 2 years and counting dearies!!!
(notice pk is MIA? =>)

who else did i see at zouk... hmmm. noone.
but my skirt flew. like, REALLY flew. blah.
and so it was a real quick peek-a-boo for my purple undies.
est!!! where were u?? i had on PURPLE undies!!!
hahahahahha.

i think andy called me. when i was ouside zouk. yes.. i think he did. hahahaa... i cant rmb! =x

then it was back to warehouse. omigosh!!! i saw cindyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she's sooooooooooooooooo cute!!!! i reallyreallyreally miss that girl. haha.
rmb to tell the callers that u're the supervisor k!! haha.

and... erm... watching sheryl dance. getting jealous cos sheryl got a new jacket. haha..
and the bartenders were interesting! => and xinyu disappeared for secret rendezvous!!!! blah. and jeanne dancing with... erm.. i donno who. hahahaha. oopx. did i say lotsa stuff i wasnt supposed to? haha. nvm. at least i kept the sordid details to myself. lalalalaaa...

oh yes! how can i forget my tomato. Mr HE NG who turned into a tomato! hahahaa.
the hotel toilet was sooo much better than what warehouse had to offer man..thanx for the tip! haha. and he sofas were so comfy i cld have fallen aslp!!

then it was off to prata place at sgoon.. cabbed there with leo n angelina n daryl.. then met khaywee there.. n we all had prata!!! met stef n ryan(did i get the spelling right?) n frenz there too.. n JOEL!!!! hey jo!!! ur mohawk flopped! haha. butt still cool waaaaay cool!! =>

ok. at this point of time, i have to apologise to leo n khaywee n angelina n daryl. i'm so sorry i kept laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing and..........
heh. i think i was high. yea. lack of slp u see.. ahaha.
and dearest khaywee, thankiew soooo much for cutting up my prata for me => (yes, i was too lazy to even cut up my own prata.) u'll make a great dad!! much beter than leo!! hahahaa. bu leo's nice too. he opened my drink n poured it out for me.
*sigh* what wld i do without my friends? =>
and nicenice khaywee lent me cabfare home too!! as well as walk some of the distance with me, puttin up with my lameass jokes.

then, my next stop was to drag someone out to coninue laughing with meeee!!! hahaha. so we went down to ponggol end to watch the sunrise. sad thing was, we din know which way it was supposed to come out from. so we sat there staring at the water till we realised i was coming out from behind us. wahahaha. oh. then we were trying to look at the horizon (trying but not succeeding cos there were way too many ships and stuff out there blockin the view.).. and... my someone went "hey! can u see? it's raining over there", pointing towards the sea. so we stared at the magnificent sight. till suddenly. FUCK! the rain reached us!! hahahaha. seriously super crap! picked up our stuff and started walking. (there's no point in running.. shelter too far away) walking in a seriously heavy downpour. naturally, we got all wet. flyaway skirt cldnt fly anymore.. so we freezed on the bus.

so that's how i spent my first dawn of the new year: getting a shower of blessing.
i like to think that it signifies a good year.
with warmth and happiness.
and of cos, my dearest friends.

Hello 2005, how do you do =>

First person you kissed: sheryl

First person you hugged : sheryl

First song you listened to : erm.. i reallyreally can rmb. haha. i din notice i guess..

First TV show/movie you watched : white chick =>

First food you ate : one cheese n one egg prata(kindly cut up for me by khay wee).

First drink you drank: vodka sprite..

First new friend you made: Angelina and Daryl => had prata together with leo n khaywee

Other Questions:

What were you wearing? black spag n nice flyaway skirt.

Where were you? on the stroke of midight, me xinyu, sheryl n jeanne were in the middle of the road!! hahaha

Who were you with? lots n lots of friends!!!

What do you hope for the new year? i just want to be happy. and for my friends to be happy =>

Do you have a new years resolution? nope. haha.

Do you think you will stick to it? if i had one, i still wldnt.

Do you think 2005 will be better than 2004? hmmm. yes. 2004 was mostly heartache. no good!

What is your biggest fear for 2005? -shrug- results..?

Did you party hard? nah... bad crowd..

Did you get drunk/high? YESYESYES!!! i got high n crappy n laughed n laughed. n i made someone meet me at 5.30am to listen to lame jokes! hahahahhaa.

Describe the atmosphere when the clock hit 12am: my dearie wishing me happy new yr n my siblings screaming 'happy new yr' - noisy

What was the best moment of the day? getting drenched. =>

Do you have a new years tradition? yea. i gotta kiss n hug my favourite girlfriends!!!

wait. my last post of the year.



GOODBYE 2004!!!!!!!!!
*muackx*
-hughugkisskiss-

lemme see. what so i have to say..
my brain (yes, there is one.) is not functioning properly, has not been functioning properly for some time due to the lack of sleep. =<
in other words, my complexion has gone from wrose to horrendous again.
and i have been coughing till i feels like my lungs are gonna fly out of my mouth. blah.

anw, yesterday, i had the nicest lunch since i started work. -grin-
a reallyreally nice lunch packed up in foil n delivered right to my workplace.
thankiew sooooooooooo much!!!
i noe my face din say much, but it was really good food k!!!!
don be too disappointed by my facial expressions.. the food was great. =>
so was the company. heh.
and thankiew for waiting a whole 3.5 hrs till i finished work too! hahaha
so... basically, yea. i had a great day. =>

steven is making me a happy kid. haha.
i can' really rmb why tho.. it's the first time i'm talking to him on msn and i'm actually enjoying it!! lolol.



element of challenge and adventure
a solitary siloutte above the waves



yea..may more ppl go in in January
so that the April guys have all da girls for 3 months!!




ahem...to quote
"absence makes the heart fonder"
i think, absence makes the heart fond to fondle elsewhere





hahahahhaa. this guy is good!!!!! lolol. =>
-yawn-
he dosen't know i'm quoting him!!! shhhhhhh!!!!



i'm hugging boobananaboringblueballs (that's the name of my carebear that xinyu gave me for
christmas!).. haha. he is very squashable indeed. =>


I JUST LOST TOMORROWS LUNCH!!!!! not fair. -sulk-
i want lunch u idiot!!!! not fair. -sulk-


in case u can't tell? i'm really bored. yes esther, i know you're esta n i'm really bored. yesyes... -yawn- i miss u small lil thingie!! hhahahaaa...



OHOHOH!!! xinyu!!! sheryl!!!! i got white chicks!!! it's movie time!!!!!!!! wheeeeeee!!!!!!!



i wonder what is mr chong doing. hmmmmm......

hmmm.
have been missing a particular someone.
am missing a particular someone.
a particular someone that i feel comfortable with.


bestie andy??? let's go for coffee.. like real soon?
i need to talk.. (u don't have to. i can do all the talking!! =>)
and i miss you too.



kim?? HE JUST SAID HE MISSES ME!!!!!!! hahahahahahah!!!!!
i miss you too kor. but i don like calling you kor.
haha. miss ya kimmie!!!

SOS- empty
zouk- $38
china black- $45

ended up at indochine. sex on the beach and a slow comfortable screw, with a kiss.
was eating practically the whole night.. burger king, then indochine, then swensens.
oh. then there was the foam attack.. i din know wheher to laugh or cry..
but tears came out anyway.. and then i laughed..

somehow christmas somehow summed up my whole year.
people who came along for the ride at the start, then dropped off half way, leaving the atmosphere somewhat.... quieter...
people who stepped in, changed my life, then left. but their presence is still felt. will always be felt.
people who drop a surprise attack.. then disappear, but yet keep coming back at intervals, leaving me at a loss as to what to do, and how to react.

i no longer want to remain the safety net. i want to be the one scaling the walls with you. and i don't want to settle for second place. i don't want to share. i don't want to hurt. i don't want to cry.

the truth hurts.. as always. cuts deep.. knowing that what you thought was all a facade, and the truth is that you were, to a certain extent, being used.

no longer in my corner, i am stepping out.. slowly.. but surely..
afterall, i just want to be happy.
and i just want you to have your peace.. to have your own share of happiness too.
there is always a listening ear here if you need it tho.

but only a listening ear. cos that's all that's left.
the rest you have burnt and destroyed. so there's nth left.
an empy soul perhaps, but always a listening ear.






Merry Christmas everyone. =>

merry christmas eve!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

xinyu and sheryl and weiying are here now.
just had dinner... shld be going out soon.. tho i reallyreally feel like sleeping.. sigh.

had a lovely day yesterday.. heh. went to spca (which was closed =<), took 70 all the way to the end... ended up at some uluated place.. blah. then went back to suntec.. bough prezzies!!!!!!! then went for movie! => walked ard after that then went back home.. cos i had W O R K. blah. boring life..

and i'm a bored kid.... sigh. sheryl is staring at me. she denies it. hahaha.
that idiot was SITTING ON ME!!!!! (she says she's a retard, not an idiot. but idiot sounds good.)
hahahaa.... mad.

ok. yinsiu has arrived. time to change n go meet her.. bye people!!!!!!!!!

*muackx*

my com is dead my com is dead!!!!!!!!!

ya. that's the reason for my absence. i'm too busy with my mundane life as an office girl anyway. wait a minute, did i mention LIFE??? nono. i have no idea what to call it, i have no life currently. blah.

hey xinyu!!! u're back from japan!!!!! did u miss me???? cos i missed u idiot!! haha.. -big fat hug-

and sheryl quitted her job within 3 hours. i applaude you my dear, but seriously, that job is child labour! heh.

oh. my ego right now is so huge that i have trouble going through narrow doorways. -grin-

I WAS SELECTED!!!!! to represent the school. -grin- but i rejected them. heh. oopx. i just don wanna go up there and get criticised by people la.. hehe.. so why did i go to the audition in the first place? for fun. to prove to myself that i do not suck!!!! lalalallaaaaaaaa.............

and by now, i know you're saying: damn, her ego fucking big leh.. still happily write it out here that she got selected.. walao eh.... wanna slap her fucking fat face sia!!!

-grin- slap lor... heh. you'll only succeed in giving me a natural blush on my cheeks! (save makeup!!)

but seriously, it's like the first time in my life my ego blossomed immensely.. and everyone has their first times yea??

ok. on office life. it sucks.
politics everywhere. the bloody supervisor kbkb cos i keep taking half days off. no work stay for what?! at least i don't take money for nth k!! i finish my work and scoot!! HUR~

whatever. i got another audition to go for anyway. -grin-

then it's EBS with my girls!!! luv ya!! *muackmuackx* (mean girl style)

and gracie?? i can't play squash just yet.. but after christmas k??? *promise* haha.. we got all the time in the world... unlike the poor guys...

the guys have all disappeared!!! whisked off to the middle of nowhere by the loving and naturing government who want them change from boys to men! haha. ok. i'm crap. still, i hope they're fine and well!!!

and.. here's a tribute to the late Mr John Lim:

Dear Mr Lim,

you never taught me anything, but somehow, we could just start talking. and i'm not the kind who starts talking to strange teachers suddenly.. or strange people for that matter. you were just too friendly.. i want to use all the beautiful and big vocabulary to describe you, but the only word that comes to my mind now is "nice". short and simple, like you. (forgive the pun) a very nice and very simple but very helpful and very friendly teacher. you were an amazingly enthusiastic and encouraging teacher. i remember our last conversation; you said the school shld spend money on new rackets for floor ball, i wanted the money spent on a new track. i hope the school seriously considers setting up an official floorball team, for you. that's what you wanted, as i remembered.. whatever it is mr Lim, i sincerely wish that you and your wife are enjoying an everlasting honeymoon now.. May God Bless You.

love, me.

haven eaten so much for a long time.
cray fish and prawns and crabs and vegetables and fish and desert and mee goreng and... erm... cant rmb. whatever. i ATE. alot. =>

and after everyone finished eating, i was still happily eating! -grin-
once again, i prove myself to be a world class pig.
i eat, and i sleep! =>


oh.. received some threatening message in friendster.
reminded me of the secondary school nonsense i used to create.
tsktsk.. childish me... =/
nvm, i don do that anymore.. that's what matters! haha

hello there.
yes you.. the one reading this!!

haha. how is life??
good? great?? wonderful??
mine is mundane.
yea..

take care of yourself!! i'm b o r e d.
i miss studying at coffee bean.
ok i lie. i just miss coffee bean. i don't miss studying. =>

i think i shld start getting a life.
heh.

ttfn!!

happy birthday mom!!!! =>

fine.
so i'm a dumb fuck.
the com is still virus-y.
blah.
AND YOU'RE A BONOBO!!

Trip to S.africa, as compared to first prom and sec sch gathering.

i'd choose the former, if only my passport was valid, and i had the moolah.
blah.

YOU ARE A BONOBO!!

blah. tio virus.
bloody virus eventually stopped me from entering my desktop.
had to reformat, BEFORE I HAD OPPORTUNITY TO SAVE ALL MY STUFF!!!

F U C K !!!!

blah.
so i lost all my chat logs, my pix, my poems, my lyrics, my songs, my weird horoscope stuff, my compos, and all the rest. dammit. I LOST ALL MY MEMORIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *bursts into tears*

damn technology and all the eat-finish-nth-to-do idiots who came up with all these viruses.
argh.

i want all my stuff back........... sob.
bye baby. u were lost too. =<

and i'm supposed to be studying. haha.
i was busy fixing my com.

yes, only one thing to be proud of: i did everything myself.
that includes getting the virus, and geting rid of it, and fixing the com.

I'VE GRADUATED!!!!!!!!!!!


gee... that was quick.

i rmb first 3 months at sr.

meeting yanjun and mandy who were so enthu as to scream with me.
then there was leo and pk, who screamed with us.. did they..? i can't really rmb.... haha.
then there was the camp fire!!!! and "F4"!!!! wahahahaa.... and daryl was running ard, and leo ran out to kiss him!!
then we were jumping ard and kicking ard.. singing and cheering "nehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehnehneh"!!!!!!!!
then it was off to mac for ice creams and stupid jokes.
"1 is barbie doll, 2 is the table, 3 is the mirror, what is 4?"
daryl joined us at mac. it was there that i knew him, before that, he was just this joker trying to do the sch dance for a forfeit. hahahaa..he looked so cute!!!
got to know stef only on... cant rmb, it was when proper school started.
khay wee too. wasnt all that acquantainted till we went shooting and the bbq.. i think. haha.
dosen't matter. what matters is that the 8 of us made friends, and i'm glad we remained friends!!

then it was orientation at tpjc.
i rmb me, pk, deehui, ming hui, and another guy whose name i forgot. heh.
then i left the sch at ard 10. i think.
the second day at orientation, me, pk, forgotten-name-guy left ard 10 again. haha
appeal to NY got thru, dragged pk there, he appealed, we got thru!
(pk stinks after bball!! ahahhahahaaa!!!! then again, who dosent.)
then it was eating pizza at NY. the only part of the orientation i attended.

school started. i was in the same class as esther. -pukes-
but look at us now?? i love that little mouse!! ahahahaa
and time flew past. it really just flew past.
i rmb almost half the class skipping chinese!! hahahaa...
i hated mr kooi, i learnt to respect kooi.
i hated econs, i still hate econs.
i failed gp, i rised to the top suddenly, and i'm at the middle.
i went in loving lit, now i'm sick and tired of everything.
walking thru the library looking for llamas and apes.
the school was like a zoo! haha, llamas and apes and mouses and rats!!
i miss the library.

and now, it's all over.
i'm out of the school i never liked..
out of the place where the ppl i love or can't stand meet at everyday.
byebye people. i love y'all.

it's exams first, then university.
then the real world.
frankly, i'm scared.
scared of what is to come.




stay with me.. walk thru this journey with me... will ..?





brought my tie to school, tho i never got to wear it.
never got to go to my favourite classroom for the last time.
made miss chew tear. that was nice. cos she had just said,"i'm not gonna cry today..."
i'm gonna miss seeing miss chew.
she made me tear with what she said. she's one genuine teacher. i love her.
i'm proud to say i was the first outta the hall after tthe ceremony!! haha.
rushed down for food! wheeeee!!!!!!!!
gracie kissed me!=>
i kissed ginny. haven seen her for ages. then i kissed joanne.
then i couldnt find gracie to kiss her. blah.
GIRL SCHOOL GIRLS ROCK!!! hahahaaa.. (tho i was only there for 6 years =>)

i love you all. so much.
and though i can't say i love ny, at least i don't hate the place anymore.


i'm a schooless kid now. =>

God bless the sick boy, let him get well soon. Amen.

check out this webpage: imh.com

you just might identify with some of the symptoms!! =>





decided to do what ginny did.. random thoughts, musings and lyrics right now.




1. my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like; it's better than yours, damn right, it's better than yours; i could teach you, but i have to charge

2. crazy in love

3. FUCK!!!! argh.

4. sin2x = 2sinxcosx

5. let me do that dirty dance with you; money, shake that sexy body, i just want a nasty girl; now tell me if that nasty girl's in you

6. where are are you now?

7. silence. fuck silence. fuck you.

8. kidnapping and murder and tragic car accidents.

9. in kindergarten, a stinky boy bit my arm real hard. i just stared.

10. BOOBANANABORINGBOINGYBLUEBALLSBLAH

11. make a wish, take a chance, make a change, and break away

12. i'll spread my wings and learn how to fly; tho it's not easy to tell you goodbye.

13. i've got real horny friends. lol

14. i wanna be a gynae.

15. oligopoly is the singlish way of saying oli attends a polytechnic.

16. in monopoly the firm is the industry.

17. i miss *you

18. NANA!!! FIX UR COM!!!!

19. d'ya think xinyu is in sch??

20. i betcha sheryl is still sleeping! haha

21. I pick all my skirts to be a little too sexy; Just like all of my thoughts they always get a bit naughty

22. cry me a river i'll cry you a river.

23. alcohol treatment; the podium beckons

24. get tangled up in me.

25. weiying is staring at my com. she's not studying anymore. she is tired.

26. i live in my dreams, sometimes, i scare me.

27. the toenails, on the other hand, never grow at all.

28. pimple faced, thwarted mind.

29. what are *you doing?

30. do you mind spending everyday, out on my corner in the pouring rain?

31. when someone kisses your right cheek, offer your left as well.

32. y'all go learn chinese, y'all go speak chinese

33. Y'all gon' make me lose my mind; Up in here, up in here.

34. i refuse to give up; refuse to give in; u're my everything

35. on this point, as on all other points, i am firm.

Psychosis is not a specific illness, rather it is a syndrome. The central characteristic of psychosis is a loss of reality testing, resulting in some degree of impairment of judgement. The psychotic state is evident by the presence of disturbance of perception, such as hallucinations or disturbance of thinking, such as disordered thinking and delusions.
Even before the onset of the florid symptom characteristics of psychosis, a person may show some disturbances during the pre-psychotic or prodromal phase. Some of these symptoms include:

-Perceptual disturbances such as feelings that things around have changed

-Mood disturbances such as anxiety, depression, mood swings, irritability and anger

-Cognitive disturbances such as poor attention and concentration, difficulties in thinking,
suspiciousness and unusual beliefs

-Behavioural disturbances such as change in sleep and appetite patterns, social withdrawal, loss of interest in things, deterioration in occupation and academic functioning.

Different people will probably interpret these disturbances differently. Some may see them as symptoms of stress, especially if the changes are associated with some stressful life events. Others may see them as part of the person’s personality. Cultural influences may also play a part in how the symptoms of psychosis might be interpreted. Psychotic symptoms are often attributed to supernatural causes rather than biological causes. The personal understanding of the disturbances will determine the help seeking behaviour. Even for those who suspect that it may be a mental condition, the stigma of seeking psychiatric help may deter them from consulting a psychiatrist. It is not surprising that there is often a long delay, sometimes even a few years, before the person reaches professional help.

General practitioners and counsellors may be the first contact point for the person or his family to raise concerns about the person’s change in behaviour and functioning. It is important to have a high index of suspicion in order to pick up cases of possible psychosis and refer them early for further evaluation and treatment. This is especially so if the person exhibiting prodromal symptoms has these associated risk factors:

-A positive family history of schizophrenia or psychotic disorder, especially among first degree relatives

-Vulnerable personalities such as those with schizotypal personalities

-History of occasional brief symptoms of hallucinations or delusions




hmmm..... sounds familiar. =>

foie gras and crab bisque. i still don't like foie gras.

kangeroo steak. n did i mention kangeroo steak? it don taste like chicken, it taste like beef, only richer, like venison. words can't describe the exquisite tastes. *slurps*
and the tuna!! not out-of-the-can tuna, but nice red tuna, that looks uncooked. yuck. but tastes heavenly!!
and pork belly that's so tender it almosts melts in your mouth.

cocktails and wine, both red and white.
makes my meal any day =>

creme brulee!!!! the perfect dessert. sweet and fattening!
baked pineapple and vanilla. delicious.

Doc Chang's at Raffles,
where service charge is absolutely justified.

the ambience is lovely too..
Raffles hotel is indded a Grand Old lady,
great architecture and interior design.

fine dining makes me a happy girl,
and my God-brother is older then my father. lol.

kimmy treated me to breakfast. haha!! finally got my treat!!
and cos i had a gd start of the day,
i had a G R E A T rest of the day! =>




today i met the love of my life.

i saw him at the busstop.
he turned in my direction with a grin on his face.
at once, my knees buckled,
i thot i would die right there and then cos my heart melted.

his bus came, and i followed him up.
i din bother to check the bus number,
i just wanted to be close to him..
so i sat right next to him.

he fell aslp after awhile,
so i could observe him without getting caught..
he was a typical chinese boy,
yet he was so different.

his lashes were long,
coal black against his fair skin..
his eyebrows were thick and dark,
his bottom lip was invitingly full.

i drew a picture of him as best as i could..
i drew him in my lit txt book..
then i settled down to read boring jane austen,
and suddenly, JA became interesting.

all this while i took sneak peeks
at that lovely boy by my side..
i couldnt help but grin to myself.
darn. i looked like an idiot!

then suddenly he stirred,
he opened his eyes lazily..
and looked ard in a daze,
then reached out to press the bell.

i shifted to make way for him..
inhaled the scent of his cologne as he passed.
watched as he made his way to the lower deck,
scooted to the inner seat and felt his warmth penetrate my body.

i looked out of the window,
and he turned to look for me.
i just knew he was looking for me.
he smiled, and gave a little wave..

as he walked away,
i blew him a lil' kiss..
i know it's not the end,
i'll wait there till i see him again.

ok. i'm a happy kid now.
-grin-

sincere apologies dearest blog, for my earlier profanities. =>

ok. i just feel like fucking swearing. nabeh cheebye. kanina. what the fucking hell am i doing up so early?? cos i'm in the fucking school. i'm NOT fucking going for maths. forget it and screw off. econs might be a thought, then again, i'm fuckin pissed at econs and everything to do with it at the moment, so econs can go screw itself in the ass too. yup. i've got basically nth betta to do till 9.40, which is lit, which is currently not very appealing either. I SHOULD HAVE FUCKIN STAYED HOME N SLEPT!!!!! lanjiao. n as of today, i officially H A T E the ugly mother fuckin neighbours. they fucking saw me coming down the stairs but din bother to wait. i was less than 5m away from the lift and they closed the door on me!!! !@#$%^&* chao cheebyeS.
(this is getting boring. i need to brush up on profanities.)
bloody rotting apples and dead fish smell-alikes. (tianbao pls stop staring. it's rude to read over ppls back. =>) i cant stand the whole lot of u!! the irritating little pests running n screeching at the corridor, interrupting my beauty sleep, i wanna feed u expired chocolate laced with rat poison. u annoy the shit outta me. i don't give a fucking damn that u don't like me, cos get this u little bastards, i dont like u either!!!





ok. i'm feeling better. but i still hate exams, schools, competition and the likes.
it ruins the minds, screws up friendships, induces conflicts.

my lil sweetiepie was really cute last night.
she was throwing tantrums cos her bottle had no more water n she was thirsty.
guess what she did?
she managed to knock he bottle out of the holder onto the floor,
creating a din that made me go calm her,
at the same time realising that she was annoyed cos she had no more water to drink.
sometimes i wonder what i'll do without her...
noone to talk to, noone to fight with..
noone to cajole..
and noone to jump up n bite my ass.
i love my lil sweetie. =>

i grieve, yet dare not show my discontent
i love, yet am forced to seem to hate
i dote, yet dare not what i ever meant;
i seem stark mute, yet inwardly do prate;
i am and am not - freeze, and yet i burn.
since from myself, my other self i turn.

my care is like my shadow in the sun-
follows me flying, yet flies when i pursue it,
stands and lives by me, does what i have done.
this too familiar care doth makes me rue it.
no means i find to rig it from my breast,
till by the end of things it be supressed.

Some gentler passion steal into my mind,
(for i am soft and made of melting snow)
or be more cruel, Love, or be more kind,
or let me float or sink, be high or low,
or let me live with some more sweet content,
or die and forge wha love e'er meant.

eh... i'm here not cos i'm not studying k...
i'm just taking a break.
2 hrs of maths is lethal!!
and i need to complain.

i know tmr is children's day.. SO??!!!!!
that bloody sch downstairs is ANNOYING THE SHIT OUTTA ME!!!!
they're playing all sorts of songs... blaaa.....
so noisy.. so annoying.
i cant stand ppl having fun when i'm trying to study. blah.

and if i had known earlier,
i'll be happily studying in the amk area.
not at home.
and i'll have eye candy there too...
RAAAAAA......

i'm so hungry i've eaten everything in my fridge!!
hahahahaaa...

ME WANTS FOOOOD!!!!!!!

i lost my ballet shoes..... =<

i saw kim yuannnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and he said i look horrible.
which is fine, cos i DO. hahaa...
so i shall not kick his ass for saying this.

but my dearest kor, u still owe me LOADSA stuff!!
lalalalaaa....
all the best for promos!!

hello people!!! i am back to advertise for yet another of my friends!!!
this time, it's Yiwen!!

yup!! this girl has been nominated as one of FHM's Girl Next Door!!


to view more variety of girls, simply purchase a copy of this months fhm...

but most importantly, VOTE FOR YIWEN!!!!

procedures are simple, simply visit log on to
fhm's voting page,

or sms : " FHM vote 54 " and send to 74000

here she is:








reasons why you shld vote..? just one thing.. haha

wen's got super nice boobs!!!!! *grin*

okok... she's the nice sweet kinda girl next door with all the FHM qualities!!

i oughta watch my tongue.
watch my words..

hmmm... this goes out to

ESTHER MARIAM CECILY SMALL LITTLE MIGHTY MOUSEY LEONG ENLING
whose birthday is today!!!!

and

my bestie ANDY TAN i-forgot-the-rest....
whose birthday was yesterday!!!


HAVE A WONDERFUL WONDERFUL YEAR AHEAD!!!!!!!!!

thankiew for being such lovely friends!!! all the best in the 18th yr of ur life!!!

haha.. for some reason or other... i'm just on HIIIIIGGGGGHhhhhHHHHHh today!! lol.

maybe its the fact that i did extremely well for maths!! (ya right!)

who cares. lol.
anw, played life at est's house... haha.. I GOT 3 BOYS!!!!! WHEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
i'm gonna get a forth next time! -grin-

est's bro is the cutest lil boy ever!!! n he happily made the gate open n sht n open n shut n open n shut n...... my right leg is half dead now. hahaaa.. but its ok.. anything to make that cute lil boy happy!! hahaa =>

then the 3 of us went maddd taking photos and doing silly dumb things!! -grin-
took like, 94875132279898 pictures... till he camera went flat n died. hahaa! This is what i call P L E A S U R E!!

and yes, i love est n i love ying. i'm glad that one dosen't hate me anymore, and the other has turned bitchy like me! hahaaa.... WE RULEEEEE!!!! (we rock jus sounds so bad..... lolol)and.. well... maybe est and i are bad influences.. but ying's not complaining... its good to see the puns and create humour ya?? *grin*
inside joke. lalalaa...

LURVVVEEEE YAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!

ps. we DID study lit as well k!!!

oh... MAIA N SYL N OLI RULLLLEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!
so glad all of them are iN!

today was a badddd day.... slpt thru the alarm.. then rushed down to meet ying, ster n have mac breakfast.. thankfully, it was a good afternoon. -grin-

had spicy tuna n caesar and tuna at coffee bean, on the house! =>
THANKIEW LADY!!!!!!!

then the day turned bad again.

cos of students from a particular try-so-hard-but-still-can't-make-it school. i shall not mention y they annoyed us, but anw, i don wanna sit near them. that try-so-hard-but-still-cant-make-it thing might be contagious. hurhur~

and after that, students from mr toh n mr lee's current school annoyed the shit outta me. they were busy flirting with some girls from a not-so-gd sch, and making a hell lota noise. hello?? u annoyed the wrong person!! i was so tempted o send a msg n get their vp down.... BUT, i made myself be nice. lalalaaa....

anw, was on the way home after that... on the upper deck of the bus n guess wa? saw 2 two xinmin students KISSING at the bussop before the boy boarded the bus. argh. at least wait till it's dark when vision is more blurred ma... omg. the xm uniform so obvious somemore. aiyo.... -shake head- next time, try obscuring public's eye by like, going behind he huge posters or something???

anw, most imptly, PLEASE VOTE FOR BENJAMIN SONG!!!!

Dearest Friends, Foes, people who love me, people who hate me, xinminians, ex-xinminians, and passerbys,
let me tell u all about my dearest friend BENJAMIN SONG!! fondly addressed by me as benjy!!

he has been nominated as school beau.. so PLEASE vote for him!!!!
it is really easy. u just have to sign up for a user name and as you are only allowed one vote a day, ensure that u go to that site once a day and vote for dearest benjy!! *smiles sweetly*
just click HERE now
u may be asking Y vote for him...
let's keep it short k..

#1 he is TALL (177)
#2 he is NOT fat (59kg)
#3 he is FIT
#4 he has oh-so-lovely arm muscles!!(think superman!! )
#5 he has a well formed 6-pack.
#6 he is so strong he can lift a girl of 60kg. (that's like, his weight!)
#7 he has mesmerising eyes!
#8 he has a cute smile!!
#9 he has nice hair =>
#10 he has a great dress sense!!
#11 he looks good half-naked!! *winks*
#12 he is good in many sports
#13 he never lets the girl pay (what a gentleman!!)
#14 he has a friendly disposition
#15 he is sensitive, yet not overtly sensitive
#16 he is a kind heated guy
#17 he loves animals (how sweet!!)
#18 he is caring! (he cleaned my wound when i fell down!! how sweet can u get?!)
#19 he has a great sense of humour
#20 he knows when to be serious


these are observations made since 1999!! yup.. benjy's really a nicenice guy...
and the best part is he's single!! so girls, vote for him!!! there's no girlfriend to get pissed cos he's THE hunK!! (and u can try get to know him as well!!!) haha... once again....


click HERE to vote for Benjamin Song!!

here are some picures of him!!

.









him and gorgeous teacher



him and weiying



him and xinyu



him and chengxiang and mr sharma

hmmm..... so..... ya... vote for benjy HERE !!!!


Thank you for your kind support!!!!!

TEACHER : Why are you late?
BALGOBIN : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
BALGOBIN : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
BALGOBIN : You told me to do it without using tables!

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, how do you spell "crocodile"?
BALGOBIN : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
BALGOBIN : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
BALGOBIN : "HIJKLMNO! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
BALGOBIN : Yesterday you said it's H to O !

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, go to the map and find North America.
BALGOBIN : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Balgobin !

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
BALGOBIN : Me !

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, why do you always get so dirty?
BALGOBIN : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

BALGOBIN : Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER : I think so. What do you want me to write?
BALGOBIN : Your name on this report card.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
BALGOBIN : Don't bite any.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-**-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, give me a sentence starting with "I".
BALGOBIN : I is...
TEACHER : No, Balgobin. Always say, "I am."
BALGOBIN : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of "COINCIDENCE?"
BALGOBIN : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree,
but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish
him?"
BALGOBIN : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

BALGOBIN : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
BALGOBIN : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !
BALGOBIN : Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him,what virtue would I be showing?
BALGOBIN : Brotherly love ?

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Now, Balgobin, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
BALGOBIN : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : Balgobin, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
BALGOBIN : No, teacher, it's the same dog !

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
BALGOBIN : A teacher



hmmm.... i have no idea what's up with balgobin.. but someing to take minds of lovely boring black n white notes. => smile

the end!! =>