hmm.... yesterdae com crazzee.... couldnt blog.. couldnt sae thanx.. but don realli feel like thanking anyone yesterdae also.. i also blurblur on wat i did... life seems so hazy... supposed to go orchard chiong.. but din go in de end... so sian.... did nth at all... results... ok la... but noone wanna go ac wif me.. tat sux... suxsuxsux....... maybe going sa wif liuyin.. maybe sheryl also... hope dey wont pang sei me.. congrats to debate!!!

daryl say i look lian now...... = /

eh... went sch todae =< tat freaking maomao catch my hair first thing in de morning!!! bleah!!! anywae.. miss g let us slack during tutorial n denise played de piano..... so nice!!!!!!! hehehee.. i recorded it!! haha... decided not to go to sch anymore except for lit lesson... told my ma n she said ok.. yeh!!! haha... went to meet zhi after tat.. walk ard ps.. bot 4 badges... den went to cine to find xinyu, ken n sed.... daryl n his class were upstairs bowling.. so i went to say hi.. haha... yea.. we bowled too.... got 2 strikes todae.. de first time in my life!!! hahahaa...

hehehe... went to rebond again... feel so gd... ook abit jap now leh.. haha... den went to meet ben at orchard first... saw zhi.. went to sae hi.. met his gd fren n his cousie.. den bring ben go buy beard papa.. hee~ eggie so nice.. treat ben wor!! haha.... met weiying, shimin, pn n sx after tat... go take pix!!!! hahaha..... my fave!! lolx!! hey sx!! i'm glad u found the one.. all de bez n hell take her father!!! hee~

met robin n koh shimin during break todae... miss dem.. haha... met dem again after sch n went to poke ball wif dem, xy, pn at somerset.....its confirm liao... o level results coming out this wed... haix... scary... scared of eng... scared i cant meet my standards... sobx.... anywae... tok to zhi on de wae home.......

erjie.. neva be afraid to face up to ur own feelings.. shuo chu lai zong bi chang zai xin li hao....

erzi... i noe tat i havent been there for u when u needed someone... but i wanna tell u this now.. ni yao jiu da ku yi chang.. jiu zai ye bie xiang le... shi ni de jiu shi ni de.. bu guan fei de duo yuan.. zong you yi tian ye hui hui dao ni shen bian de..... let it go. if it comes back it is yours.. if it dosent it neva was...

de cage door was open but de little bird was apprehensive of flying.. afraid tat once she took flight.. de cage door would close n she would be locked out... neva again able to return to the protected environment where everything was provided for her.... conflicting thots dashed ard her mind like speeding bumper cars... shld she join her frenx outside de cage n live enjoy de freedom n de wilderness?? or stay in her cage where she would be secure n filled wif warmth?? de grass is alwaez greener on de other side...

hmmm.... went out wif xinyu todae... (sorri dear... i seriously din mean to pang sei u again n again....... )bot chairling's prezzie.... dangling start earrings... so chio!! hehe... den eggie treat us to bread papa... haha... sho nice of him yea?? hmm... maybe he trying to suck up to me cos he wanna be my jie fu..... hehehe..... watching michael jackson now... he don seem sho crazzee to me now.... he seems to be someone whjo juz don wanna face up to reality.. someone who don wanna grow up n face de world.. he seems to be trying to hide.. he probably changed his skin colour so as to cut himself off from his past... his terrifying past.... n his home... so big... so beautiful... neverland... his home ish bout de size of singapore.... it has a zoo, a funfair.... its everything tat anyone could wish for... but he muz be so lonely... imagine being de onli occupant of singapore...

lalala... so happie todae!!! went shopping wif my mama n bot lotsa thingies!!! hehe... fruitful dae.. lalala..... oh ya.. before tat went for parents seminar at sp... abel was supposed to go wif his ma.. but he gotta prepare some stuff for his frenx suprise party.. so onli me, my ma n his ma... hehe...

hehe.... skip chinese lesson todae... told de tcher we were going for open hse.. lalala.... den i call xinyu half way.. denise n esther so funni!! ask me go help dem tell de chinese tcher tat we skipping chinse wif reason.. haha.. dey donno how to explain in chinese!! lolx!! hee~ when we were walking outta sch... saw robin!!! i miss him sooooooooo much!!! veriveri long no c him liao!!!!! den me, him n ben go find xinyu den go eat.. after tat dey so hg mall play game (so boliao rite??!!) n me n xinyu go shopping (tats wat i call spending time wisely!! hehe..)... walk ard... saw chairling... hehe~ den walk somemore... go take pix.. saw zhen jia... go eat supper.. saw zhen jia again.... go eat ice cream... den go home... hehe..... haix... i miss everyone so much... 4e3' 2002 foreva n eva!!!

hehe... pon sch todae.... been planning for it like so long liao.. finally took action.. n i din tell my ma.. till evening.. pricked by conscience la.. heng she neva scold!! hehe.. all de lit students in my class pon todae lor!! haha... my class onli left 7 ppl todae!! hahaha....oh ya!! de freaking black woman doc dowan giv us mc lor!! so sick rite??!! anywae.. we wanted to go tp open hse at first.. den lata decided to watch movie instead... haha.. watched "down". its a new horror movie.. juz opened todae... n its damn nice!!! veriveri gd show!!! hahaha!! kinda got abitta sci-fi... hee~ went to poke ball after tat.. den go meet mama for dinner.. => sian... tml got 2 test..... n one ish a maths test!!! bleah~

haha.. juz now got road race.... me, liuyin, peirong n lynnette walk all de way lor.. lolx... n guess wat??? stef finally came to sch after 2 weeks!!! hahaha.... den after tat, me, yanjun n stef change uni.. hehe.. red skirt look nice la.. n jun look so ij-ish!! lolx.. yea.. stayed back for lit den went to meet dem for free seoul garden... kaox... keep eating till i so bloated... den keep toking n luffing, toking n luffing..... bth sia!! haha.... n daryl squeezed lime juice into de yam ice-cream!! so bad rite??!! lololololx.. lalala.... go take pix.. den go home liao... pk pang sei us half-way.. go meet church fren.. den stef's bf came den she also left after tat... => hee~ khay wee so nice!!n his phone also veri nice!! hehe~ *grins evily*

raining all dae todae.. suits my mood>> stormy... i cant believe i was so dumb to take de bus from de wrong side... realli so dumb... i'm gonna stick wif xy n sher from now onwards!! no more venturing out by myself!!! hmm... juz now when going ikea on de bus.. got 2 lian keep staring at me.. den sae wat angmohangmoh one... toot la... den heard one of dem saying "you ji ge yandao jiang wo xiang angmoh leh!!" pls lor.... go look in de mirror!!! we ate de swedish meat ball... yum-yum!! its de first meat ball tat i don find repulsive lor... hehee.. went over to queensway.. saw feifei n co... weiming rebond!! hehe.. lalala... feifei seems to have slimmed down leh.. hee~ xms taf ish damn effective!!

juz reach home... sch sux todae.. as usual.. except for lit lesson which alwaez brightens up de day... tat old maomao told us to stay back after lesson cos we went to de toilet n came to class late..den she ask if we had a conscience... so lame!!! cant stand her!! n its onli pc lor.. kaox.. purposely pick on us!!! anyway.. i read an article todae.. n it said tat if we were to start a gratitude diary n enter 5 things we are grateful for each day.. we will look back at it n be veri pleased wif our life.. so i'm gonna start todae!!!

haiyo.. juz reach home.. my net is coking up again.. as usual... cant stand.... it sux.. met up wif xiao shi n xuelin todae.. cant believe wat xuelin told me... cant believe tat such a thingie happened to my dearest ger.... she neva used to be liddat.. but den again.. ppl change... i juz hope tat she'll come out ok.. juz hope tat she'll be alright...

heee.. reached home bout 11... lalala.. went east coast wif zhi juz now... damn... cycle till my butt so pain!!!! bth... hmmm.... den on de way back.. stopped at eunos... go toilet.. went to eat ice cream.. i lazy to take bus den take cab.. hehee...lalala... had a great day except for buttaches.. n I NEVA FALL OF MY BIKE TODAE!!!! a veri big achievment!! neither did i bang into any thing.. heheheh!! but i suddenly stop la.. den ppl behind almoz bang into me.. lalala... ride behind me for wat.. so stupid!! haha

hee~ v-dae juz over.. got lotsa stuff from my frenz n class ppl... sho sweet... hee~ lotsa chocolate.. gonna get veriveri fat!! lolx!! anywae.. a veri big thankies to u all... n congrats to de senior debate team who won de 1st round todae... lets hope de next round goes well too!! ganbatte!! went to meet xinyu n sheryl after tat.. saw wilson den i poke him.. went to look for yuan lin while waiting for xy n sher.. den when we were walking to heeren.. saw yeehui.. forgot to wish her happi b-dae.. haha.. oh ya.. happie sensational seventeen to my dearest bitch ayu n to yee hui.. ya.. den chris pass me de pix of de cute little punk we saw on cny.. onli 3 yr old so shuai liao.. next time will be a heart-breaker sia!! hehe... take care ppl!!
hey boi!! thanx so much n happi v-dae!! luv u!!

which francesca lia block girl are you?

(quiz created by shelle)

lolx... wanted to go home early today.. then ben called pn during gp..den our gp relief tcher got date so he ask if we wanted to go off earli (eat snake!!).. den met ben n apple lor.. dey came inside de canteen to wait for us. dh join us cos she was going to apple hse to help him wif some stuff.. end up all go apple hse to make sushi n cookies.. haha.. reach home bout 10.30.. took cab.. haha... sian la.. no bus.. hee~ de cookies.. not bad la.. for first attempt.. hehe..
happi valentines dae to all!!!

Have you even been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so
vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it
means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all
these defenses. You build up this whole armor, for years, so
nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any
other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them
a piece of you. They don't ask for it. They do something dumb one
day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your
own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you
out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like
"maybe we should just be friends" or "how very perceptive" turns
into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts.
Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a
>soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart
pain. I hate love. -Alisa Perne

yep... true.. veri true....

sometimes.. she makes me feel under-appreciated.....

which stereotype are you?

haha... cant tok now... my face is green... cos i got mask... budden hor... juz now sneeze... haha.. den all crumble liao!! lolx..

haiz.. i todae so guai.. went home earli... den bot dinner... spent $11 on ribs... hehehehe... not bad la.. quite nice.. heheh... juz now break tat time go heartland mall.. den left there at 2.55.. we scared late so take cab. haha.. onli $ 2.50... so funni... take cab all de way up to sch.. noneed walk!! haha... so fun!! gonna try it more often!!

eh... xinyu n jeanne came by juz now.... toktok abit den went to paopao... yuan lin was there... companying her dear... den we play daidee for awhile n her dear joined us for blackjack.. hehe.... miss tat ger sia... next time go orchard muz go find her!! hehehe... enjoy working wor!! lolx... shuddup!!!

they sae that singapore is a harmonious country.. that people live in peace.. there is social discord.. no social discord.. but i feel that what those people see are only on the surface.. if u look... realli look.... like i have... u will notice someting... through my eyes.. i realise that we are divided into 2 de english society n the chinese society.

naturally.. the eng society are considered to be more "high-class". their version of gangsters are called punks. these punks are seen as cool and "in" . the chinese version of gangsters are known as the bengs and lians. (even the name sounds more low-class) most people, me included, see them to be an immatured n uneducated bunch of ppl who try to act like they own the world. wait a minute... am i actually criticising the ppl who i once associated with??? whats happening to me?????

my family background is english. i speak english at home. but ever since i entered primary school.. my main medium has switched to chinese. all my friends have a chinese background n they all speak chinese. my secondary school used to be a chinese school. even our sch song is in chinese. the bengs n the lians were the popular ones in the school! i was juz like one of them before... adopting "god-bro" n "god-sis"... all my ex were part of the gang.. or acted like part of the gang anyway...

all of a sudden.. it seems like i'm trying to hide my past. i seldom tok to dem anymore.. i seldom speak chinese. sometimes.. i'm at a loss for topics when i do speak to them.. there is suddenly this huge gap... tats drifting further n further.... even the ppl i hang out with are different.

all of a sudden, i feel different. i guess something in me died as 2002 faded away... sometimes.. i don even know what to say when i'm wif my son... de very same person who was in the same class as me for 4 years.. this being de start of the fifth...... is it the language barrier?? the seperation between the english n the chinese societies???

wat am i? or rather.. who am i? the eng, or the chin?? i guess i'm stuck in the middle.. but sometimes.. i juz speak chin without even realising it.... is that my true calling?? or was i born an eng?? i dont know... i really dont know.. is this really what i'm feeling now?? or is it pessimism arising from pms?? whatever it is.. there are only 2 sentences to describe it.. only one is right. pick one.

1. chao - ahlian trying to pose as miss universe
2. miss universe reappearing from behind the chao - ahlian mask

i guess it all boils down to one answer. i'm a confused girl facing the first crossroads of my life. the point is which road to take.....

pon todae.... all de doc i c so nice.. he offer me extra mc.. too bad tml noneed go sch.... hehe.... den i complain bout srjc to him!! haha.. he also from acjc last time leh!! 14 yrs ago!! hahaha... went to meet xinyu after tat... yeH!!! i bot my dress!!!! haha... so nu ren wei!! lolx!! too bad.. no black.. so i took purple... hee~ ya.. den xy got meet her aunt.. i go find my mama... bot another top.. (yEsH!! goT black!!! hahaha!! ) n nailpolish!! nicenice weird colour!! i like!! lolx... on de way back rite.. saw these indian twins.. 2 gerger.. bout 7 or 8 i tink.. my ma made a funni face at one of dem.. den dey toktok.. stare at my ma.. den i glare back.. toopid blackies!! one of dem tried to diao me.. i diao back... in a damn xialan way (as usual rite.. haha). den both of dem keep looking my way.. i dowan look back!! hahaha... toopid thingies... wait i pokey ur red button ar!!! hUr~ dOn fOoL wiF mE.. i'M a qUaLiFiEd RaCiSt!!!

do eyelashes grow back after dey drop?? how long do dey take???? look funni now....

hmm... drawing on my hp now... hehe... fUn* hehe... tried so many times.. still look abit weird.. nvm... i liek can liao!! haha... lalala.... so fun... waiting to draw on sheryl's phone!!! *hinthint*

hmmmmm... so which am i?? abit of both?? maybe...... tink so........

-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

-Sensitive- You're Sensitive, and you'd like to
stay that way. Sorry,listened to a bit too much
Jewel there. You're sweet and very emotionally
charged. You definitely love the person you're
with, and always want to know how they're
feeling so you can make sure they're happy.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Image by FlamingText.com

img src="http://images.quizilla.com/V/vinacross/1041991326_fPerfectGF.gif" border="0" alt="You're Perfect ^^">
-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

pure


What's YOUR sexual fetish?
brought to you by Quizilla

you hate it. but what can do you, just complain?
it doesn't matter, just as long as you get an
A, you need to get into college.


How much do you hate school?
brought to you by Quizilla

some things are hard to sae out.. n if i realli sae out.. replies will be... its liddat la.. i last time also liddat.. now also no prob ma... but diff ppl got siff feelings.... rite.....
*dazed n confused n lost*

lolololx!!! todae go watch They wif some of my class ppl... so funni... i watch.. i scream.. den i luff.. hehehe... after tat go walkwalk... den go take pix wif dem.. hehe... after tat go meet zhi n xy... donno do wat den take cabbie go find sheryl at chompchomp... so long neva c her!!! i miss her so much!!!! after eating.. we WALK home!!! hehe.. so guai rite??!! lolx.. healthy sia!! haha.. keep toking n luffing all de way... feel so gd... feel like before.. when all so carefree n childish.. have things changed?? i tink dey have.. some things have changed anyway....
to my dearest da jie, er jie, san jie..... "as we go on.. we remember.. all de times we... had together.......... n as our lives change.. come wateva.. we will still be... frenx foreva........." luv u ppl so veriveri much... i neva wan us to part!! g4 foreva!! dong gan chao ren rox de worLd!!!

hee~ juz now go watch shanghai knights wif zhi... veriveri funni !!!!! hehe... den keep luffing.. haha... jackie chan ish damn sAat!! n even tho i don like fann... i have to admit she was not bad in de show.. haha.. her hair so long so straight so sleek... damn chio sia!! hmmm... oh ya.. de cold storage pizza not nice.. next time eat de chicken breast instead.. hehe.. yea.. den after tat go orchard walkwalk.. so quiet... hee~ walk walk liao.. my mama called.. den i ta bao bk for my ma.. sHo GuAi !!! heheh.. reached home bout 11.30.. haha... btw... do u noe de show little lulu?? i juz realised tat it rhymes wif stupid kuku!!! lololololx!!

she was lying in bed.. half aslp..or maybe she was actually awake.. but trying to tell herself tat she was aslp.. lying to herself again.. she heard voices.. quarreling... again.. she couldn't stand it.. it was like going back in the past.. ppl quarreling n she hiding.. tots reverberated in her mind till she finally fell into a deep slp...... trying to lie to herself.. telling herself de voices were part of her dream.. tat noone was quarreling.. tat todae was not chinese new year.....

oKie.. officialy chinese new year.. haha... i forgot to sae.. shu yin got best speaker for both debates held last wednesdae.. WELL DONE MAN!!! u did de xinmin debating team proud!! continue to strive wor.. too bad i wont have de chance to compete wif u.. de tcher neva submit our class names for de debate la.. sigH.. but in a way.. i'm also sick of debate la.. hehe... anyway.. 3 cheers for sharma.. shuyin n xm debate team!!! hiphip hurray!!!!